Okay, I'll admit it. I didn't want to talk about my last marathon on December 2nd, the Zappos Rock n' Roll Marathon. But the truth is like salve to a wound and I am ready to tell my story.
Running is a journey, and in every journey there are high points and low points.
Typically, I end the journey with a huge smile on my face; knowing that I am doing something I love, thinking back on where I have come from and what lies ahead.
This time, I finished with tears in my eyes and pain on my face as I crossed the finish line.
The real pain, besides physical (I became very dehydrated and cramped up for the final 8 miles), was mental. Starting off, and for the first 13 miles, I was having the strongest race of my career. Smiling and throwing the Shaka, I thought back through all the training and hard work of the Big Island Run. I was in excellent shape.
However, high wind conditions and dehydration forced me to slow my pace, and mental state changed as day turned to night.
As I said, the real pain of my final miles was mental, as I watched my Boston QT slip past and realized more importantly that I was not having fun. "Why," I thought, "am I doing this if it's not fun?" I nearly dropped out.
I have a goal at each marathon to finish with a smile on my face, and I just didn't feel happy. I felt tired and achy and ready to go back to the hotel and cry... Not the Vegas finish I was expecting.
Not ready to quit, however, I dug deep and journeyed on. And I am glad I did. I crossed just two minutes behind my PR, yes. I cried, yes. I called my mom, yes. And, I also ran stronger than my previous 5 marathons; and... well... I finished. And I'm glad I did.
What I want to drive home in the telling of the story, is not "push, push, push; pain is nothing."
Pain is an indicator that something is going wrong. Our body is hurting.
What I would like to drive home is this: Sometimes we push past pain simply to get to the other side. Simply to finish the journey; even if we don't have a smile on our face. Smiles or tears, the journey is ours to create.
What I would like to drive home is this: Sometimes we push past pain simply to get to the other side. Simply to finish the journey; even if we don't have a smile on our face. Smiles or tears, the journey is ours to create.
And I don't regret finishing.
At the lowest point for me on the Big Island Run, someone said to me, "If it isn't fun, stop doing it." And suddenly, I was considering quitting. But, I didn't quit. I journeyed on (the theme of this year's marathon), and I am so extremely thankful that I did.
In this same way, running has become a continuous journey and an integral part of life for me.
I'm okay with sometimes fighting through pain; I'm okay with ending marathons with tears. Because as with life, things are not always good or bad, black or white. There are gray areas.
In true Vegas style, I experienced it all the fuzzy places; pain, pleasure, joy and despair... oh, and then after, gluttony!
I'm okay with sometimes fighting through pain; I'm okay with ending marathons with tears. Because as with life, things are not always good or bad, black or white. There are gray areas.
In true Vegas style, I experienced it all the fuzzy places; pain, pleasure, joy and despair... oh, and then after, gluttony!
